I was talking with a woman recently who couldn’t understand why issues she had worked through in therapy so long ago had resurfaced following a traumatic birth of her baby.
It reminded me of something I had read by Friedrich Nietzsche: “When we are tired, we are attacked by ideas we conquered long ago”.
Past wounds often resurface when we experience similar feelings. This doesn’t necessarily mean we haven’t “dealt” with things, simply that we are humans, and our human minds have amazing memories. By being aware of this, we can allow ourselves permission to not feel compelled to need re-immerse ourselves in our past pains, nor do we need to force them from our minds. We can acknowledge what is surfacing, and why, and make some space for those memories and feelings. Our thoughts and emotions are like the weather, ever-changing and shifting. If we can develop an attitude of acceptance and compassion, we can find comfort in the knowledge that if we stop struggling against our experience, it will pass.
Of course, this is often easier said than done. Having the guidance and support of a psychologist can help you to achieve this. If there are old stories that are surfacing from your past that are impacting on your mood, please reach out for support.